6 Phrases That Make Me Wanna Kill: Confessions Of An Introvert

As you probably know, people are subdivided into introverts and extraverts. According to Wikipedia, “extraversion tends to be manifested in outgoing, talkative, energetic behavior, whereas introversion is manifested in more reserved, quiet, shy behavior”. Sometimes, the type of personality means a lot during the process of communication and, needless to say, introverts and extraverts are like aliens from different planets to each other. Thus, it’s not that easy to weather a relationship through stormy times… Especially for an introvert, because extravert style of communication rubs their fur the wrong way hard. So, here are some phrases and situations that drive introverts crazy.

1.”Oh hiiiiiiiii, let me kiss you”

No. No way. Not a chance… Oh ok, whatever, do your ritual you stupid cow. I’m supposed to be polite after all. Seriously, why do random people who barely know you always try to kiss you? It really makes me feel uncomfortable and… pathetic. Remember bitches, I only kiss people who are really close to me.

2. “Tell Me What You Feel”

I wonder why people always think I want to make confessions. They think that my being gloomy or silent means that I’m shy and wait for some Samaritan to come and ask me this stupid question. Believe me, if I do want to share my thoughts with you, you would be the first to know.

3. “Come closer”

No thanks, I’m perfectly good at my position right now. 3 feet away from you, my annoying extravert fella. I am an introvert, I don’t like it when someone tries to penetrate into my private space. Mind the gap. Invaders must die.

4. “The party will be fun!”

What’s the point for a person like me in going to a place crowded with people like you? It takes time for me to feel relaxed and comfortable with definite people but you keep insisting on my going to the event arranged for quick meetings and express chatters. Sounds like dissonance, huh?

5. “Why so serious?”

Dammit, dude, I am always serious. That’s the way I am. I got it from my mama if it makes it easier for you to perceive. The more you annoy me by asking why I’m this and that the less of a friend you become to me.

6. “C’mon, you can spend the night at my place”

I often hear that the party nights turn into the party mornings. Usually, by that time they also get boring and I feel like catching a cab and going home. Do you understand what staying at your place means to me? ‘Pure’ morning with hangover, unfamiliar place, sharing a room (or OMG! A bed…) with someone else, snoring, irritated people with messy hair, and a line to the bathroom. You’d better shoot me.

So, if you are an extrovert and naïve enough to think that all the people enjoy your being so talkative and easy going, you’d better memorize the above-mentioned examples and think twice before saying something like that to your introvert friends…

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